Just Surviving... One Day at a Time

That's all I can manage. Night time is my favorite time - I can knock a whole 10 hours of this misery out in one shot. The days are just torture. I feel very sorry to anyone that has to deal with the terrible monster that I've become, esp Ryan and Rory.

Don't mind me, Ill just be hiding out for the next 2 months till this all magically disappears.

Just to document, threw up for the first time today. Walked into the house, and couldnt stand the smell of it. Walked right back out and lost my cookies.

Can I Get a Refund???

So everything was going great after I found out for about 2 weeks. I thought, gee is everything ok? Im not really getting any symptoms and I remember getting lots last time! Then at 6 weeks I started to feel pretty freaking sick. Then for the last week its gotten terrible. Sooo tired, going to bed at like 8pm and very nauseous.

This week was Thanksgiving. SOoooo wonderful we spent it with Ashley & Dylan, and invited my family. It was the best Thanksgiving my mom had ever remembered, and Ashley and her mom Trish did such a great job with the food and the decorating! I was able to eat that day, although I didnt eat a lot. Then on Sat we went to Ryan's mom's house and I felt terrible. I was on the couch the whole time and threw a hissy fit about the water cause I could taste mildew in it. Sunday was a brunch with the VM Clan then ornament party for the girls. I made a breakfast casserole/bread pudding dish that is sooo yummy normally but cooking it made me almost lose my cookies. At brunch Elly made really good waffles and I ate them with whipped cream and fresh fruit. YUM. Nothing else was really appetizing to me though. I felt good enough to do the crafts, and luckily there were not any strange smells to compete with throughout the process. Then when we packed up to go home I lifted the lid to my casserole to see how much was left and it was enough to send me over the top. I almost threw up right there and had to run outside and catch my breath before coming back inside. Luckily Alyssa agreed to take it for me cause I couldnt stomach the thought of even having to bring that rotting carcass home. It was bad enough that the house still smelled like it when we got home.

Ryan has been a saint and Ive pretty much told him he'll be a single parent taking care of two kids for the next 3 months till this all goes away. I love that man.

I am so miserable I began to wonder if it was this bad last time; surely I would have never wanted to have another kid if I had to go through this once before and would have to again for a second kid.... Well lucky I started my blog at the beginning last time and have record of it. Some excerpts:

10 Weeks: "Still feeling very weak and physically exhausted all the time. Been gagging a lot. Threw up for the first time on Saturday. Not feeling as nauseas as weeks 6 & 7 though. Can’t wait to feel better, to start cooking, cleaning and walking again. The house is a mess, I miss cooking and I know the fresh air would be good for me."

12 Weeks: "Well I don’t feel as weak anymore, but I still feel awful. Food is my enemy. I am gagging over everything and if I go too long without eating, I get sick to my stomach. It’s the worst at night. I woke up at 2am starving. I ate a cracker but it was too late already and I threw up. Dinner was long since digested, so it was just bile and a cracker, but still wasn’t fun! I ate more crackers after with some water and was fine till morning."

Oh God, things were exactly this bad last time! I've been duped! Can I get a refund? I was just kidding I didnt really want to go through this again! Ill wait till I have enough money to pay someone else to do this... Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! One thing's for sure - Pregnancy Amnesia is a for real occurrence. Honestly. If we remembered how terrible this all was we would never do it again. Unless you are just a total whore and dont have any pregnancy symptoms. If thats you at least pretend you are in pain for your own sake. Or else I'll come after you with my last ounce of energy.

According to last time I should be mostly done with the morning sickness by 16 weeks. However, the other ones Im terrified of (the migraines especially). Im already experiencing the stuffy sinuses and the cotton in my ears. I thought at first it was allergies or a cold but then my blog reminded me it was the increased blood flow to my mucus membranes... Seriously I guess I was way more read up last time than this time. Good thing I have me to reference back to. lol.

Here We Go Again!

My period was due on 11/20. Friday, Nov 19th was boy's poker night at Ashley and Dylan's house. All the girls and kids were over while the boys played away (Elly with Brayden, Nicole with Luke, me with Aurora, and Alyssa - Reese is still cooking in her tummy and Ashley was out of town with Boston).

We were discussing if Nicole and I were pregnant yet (Elly, Alyssa and Ashely are all pregnant, Nicole and I had just that month started "trying"). Nicole said she was sure she wasnt but asked if I was. I said I didnt know cause I didnt take a test yet! They gave me trouble, but I responded that I wasnt due till the next day, and didnt want to take a test till I would know for sure; I didnt want to get a negative test then have to take another one to make sure I wasnt pregnant. They wouldnt take no for an answer, so upstairs I went to go take my test.

I had for sure had a few "symptoms" (cried during the Lion King in Vegas, got nauseous for a random morning on that same trip, was crazy hungry that same trip) but nothing that was so obvious that I could say for sure. Plus, I couldn't be pregnant: it was too soon. It was only the first month we were "trying"! And I was supposed to be ovulating for Halloween based on my cycle, but based on what I could tell I ovulated that week before (Oct 25-28 somewhere). We did have sex twice that week, but what were the chances?

Well as long as it took for those thoughts to go through my head, up pops the positive line on the test. "You have got to be freaking kidding me!" I yell. Everyone goes crazy downstairs "Oh my gosh you are pregnant!!!!!!!!!" Shaking I run down the stairs disbelieving. Seriously, first month off the bat again?

So then we all discuss how I should tell Ryan and we decided the best thing would be to tell him right then and there in the middle of boy's poker night. This is how it went down:

Sorry, Another Month Passed...

Ok I know. I haven’t blogged since Oct 6th and this is long overdue. And the only reason is because my computer at work got a virus on it and is scanning (a 3 hour process) and I cant do anything without my desktop.

Anyway, LOTS has happened since my last post. Rory cut like 4 more teeth and now almost has a full set. All her left side came in at once now the other side is following behind. Shes only missing like 3 up front now on that right side. Its so funny to see her with a full mouth of teeth after her not getting her first tooth until like 10 months. She is talking more and more now too. Her only really good 2 syllable word though is “Gran-pa”. And Wayne couldn’t be more proud. Shes SOOO independent now, wanting to do every little thing herself and if you even try to help in the slightest she flips out and wants to abandon the project all together. Its like she’s saying, “if your hands even so much as touch this, I don’t want any part in it!” We have moved her bedtime back to 7:30pm since she was waking up earlier, and she has ditched the afternoon nap on most days. Its hard to get her to sit down for a full meal – she prefers to snack slowly on things throughout the day as she goes about her business.

My mom has been a saint – coming for the one Friday a month that Ryan does not have off to watch Rory so I don’t have to take a vaca day… taking Rory for the weekend while we run away to Vegas… taking her the full weeks that our sitter is off but we still have to work. Like this week. As my mom said the other day, “Im watching your kid as much lately as you are!” lol. It’s a nice treat to suddenly have an open schedule, but then there are those moments when it hits you and you just wish they were there to squeeze and kiss and snuggle. (All the while they are screaming and pushing you away to leave them alone and put them down). So here’s my shout out and big THANKS to my mom, even though she doesn’t read this thing anymore.

Now we turn to the holidays! Im very excited for Rory’s first Christmas that she will actually be “participating” in. Last year she played with the wrapping paper, and that was about it. This year we will be buying her a few gifts and she will get to help decorate, (trying to convince her to leave all the nick-knacks alone and not play with and break them).

Good Thing I'm Organized...

Has it really been a whole month since I last blogged? Well that’s what the technology is telling me and technology doesn’t lie… sooo…

It is officially October, and Fall started 2 weeks ago. Did I say its October? Im going to add on “already” because I really must make my point that the year is escaping me and its completely out of control that is ALREADY October. And before I know it is going to be the end of November. Do you want to know how its going to go by so fast? Lets take a look at my calendar, shall we?

Last weekend: Oktoberfest with the Rubins (so much fun, and just a little too much drinking. Just enough food.), and my Mom’s 60^th Birthday. Wow shes officially what I consider to be ‘senior’. I mean Anything in your 30’s is still young, 40’s and 50’s is middle aged and I feel like when you get to 60 it’s a whole new level of old. I don’t feel like my mom is old enough to be old. But I digress.

This weekend: Cousin Nathan’s Bday party, followed by a recoup day (literally the ONLY one in October), and a very important hair appointment & my dear friend Venissa’s son’s 4 yr old Bday party.

Next week, among work will be the dentist, dinner for friends who just had a baby, donating blood on a lunch break.

3^rd weekend in Oct: Another friend’s son’s Bday party, and friend’s Bday party later that night (Bday count is currently at 6 including my Aunt Tina whose was not previously mentioned in an event), and Bate’s Pumpkin Patch with the VM clan and the kiddies. (Yes Nicole from here on out you will be included when I refer to the VM clan even though you don’t live here with us).

That week is Taco night for my bday, dinner with Ryan’s mom, then dinner with Brian. (I can feel the lbs packing on now).

4^th weekend in Oct: Mine and Meg’s Bday party (Bday count at 8 and counting), Phil & Nicole’s engagement party, and another pumpkin patch day with the kiddies.

Last weekend in Oct: Pumpkin carving with the VM clan, our annual Halloween party, Rory’s first actual trick-or-treating Halloween and carnival.

First weekend in Nov: Vegas baby! (with the Kaminsky’s) CANT WAIT FOR VEGAS. Staying at the Luxor, seeing Blue Man Group and The Lion King – shout out for front row tix at both for half the price. Another shout out to my mom who is watching my kid as much we are for the next month and a half.

Second weekend in Nov: Following a huge symposium at work that I am 100% responsible for planning and executing (its been in the works for a year and a half) we get to see the Schott’s on our home turf. Cant wait for that! And to meet Roscoe too!

If you got bored and were scanning the above, heres where to pick back up. (Im not judging. I know that my calendar for the next month and a half is probably really boring to most of you. I wouldn’t read yours. I really just put it up there to be a reminder to Ryan next month of why we have no money in our bank account.)

Yeah so needless to say Im tired just thinking about it all. How the heck am I going to fit in time to do shopping for all these events, and wait, there is Boss’s Day on Oct 16^th! AHhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! Next chance I get to breathe… I think I might have a heart attack out of boredom. Joking. Ill sleep for 12 days straight.

How’s the family? Great. Rory is a pleasure as always. She has had a few nights of waking up randomly in the middle, I think those canines are finally going to make their appearance. Top left is next – Im calling it. She has loved all this weather; she gets to learn about rain, and the leaves are changing (which she loves to play with). Have I mentioned that the walk to the mailbox which should be a 2 min chore turns into a 20 min fieldtrip that she LOVES each day.

Guinness got an infected va-jay-jay which was no fun. $150 later, she had to take antibiotics and wear a cone again for the first time since getting her girly parts removed. Cones are not made for dogs who have short legs. She kept doing face plants every few feet when the cone would catch on uneven ground. It was hilarious but seriously pathetically sad. Good thing it was resolved quickly.

So looking forward to this month. Still don’t know what Ryan and I will be for Halloween – Im kind of putting all our energy and money into Aurora’s adorable little blue fairy outfit. I even made her wand. It will last all of 60 seconds, but that’s just how things go with toddlers right? Ill take pictures of it first! And Im so stoked, I got my dress for my birthday party. Ross for $8.50, can you believe it? It was perfect except the sleeves were too long so I took them to my guy and for $10 he took it in. With those and my $9.99 hot heels I got there too and my birthday outfit is complete!

16 Month Dr. Visit Update

So Ryan just got back with Rory from the doctor. This was supposed to be her 15 month old apt but they didnt have an opening till now. She was:

• 19 lbs (she was actually 19.7 but they take off for clothes and diaper since they dont do naked baby anymore) and that puts her at the 2nd percentile for weight.
• 30 inches even, which puts her at 25th-50th percentile for height.
• 45.7 cm head, which puts her at 25th-50th percentile for that.

They want her to be getting more good fats (like olive oil) to keep her on track. It looks like she went from 4th to 3rd to 2nd percentile these last few times so its nothing to be super concerned with, just to be aware of and to try to make sure shes getting good healthy fats to keep her growth curve up.

End of Summer Update

Aurora has broken both bottom molars (one on each side) this week. Poor thing! For the record though, I was right; the bottom left one broke first. Although Ryan is now claiming that’s what he said. But here on my blog I have the proof, that he said it was going to be bottom right. I win. Anyway I’m so happy that she will finally be able to chew things now; shes got 4 middle up top and 2 bottom middle for biting, and now will have 4 molars, one on each side & top and bottom to chew with.

She’s loving her books more and more each day. Her favorite are the ones with simple words and bright pictures. She has a Sesame Street bubble one that she is OBSESSED with because she loves bubbles more than anything in the world. Her favorite thing to do after dinner is go to the living room where her books are and pull them from the shelf one at a time and read them while she is sitting on the doggy stairs beside the bookshelf.

In fact, she had her first tantrum the other day when we made her stay in the kitchen with us until we were done with dinner. She wanted to go to her books and we said, “you can get out of your high chair when you are done eating but you need to stay with us in the kitchen until we are done eating”. So she cried and sobbed for a number of minutes. Of course this first time she did it we had no idea why she was so upset. Last night Ryan said she probably just wants her books so we brought some into the kitchen and she was so happy with her books in the kitchen till we were done. Problem solved!

She is talking so much more too. This morning she walked into the bathroom and said “baw” I looked where she was pointing and there was a little jewelry box that she likes to play with on the sink. “Oh, box! Yes, here is your box”, it was so cute!

So we are going to Vegas in November with Nicole and Jason, leaving the kids with our parents, and we are soooo excited! We just bought Lion King Tickets, front row. Should be a wonderful show. Then the other night Nicole & Jay are going to Tim McGraw, and we will probably see one of the Cirque shows, Ka or Zumanity are our top choices. We are debating when to start trying to get pregnant. Ill be ovulating right around my birthday so I might just see where things go from there and if I start seeing symptoms in Vegas (I would be about 2 weeks along) I would just take it easy.

And at 3 months in advance, we have the holidays figured out! YAY! I cant tell you what a relief that is. With such big families on both Ryan’s mom and dad’s sides, and my family, ALL in San Diego, its hard to balance them all so everyone feels like they are getting enough time with us, and also manage to make ourselves happy so WE actually enjoy ourselves! I was not really happy with last year. I felt we made too many accommodations for others, and were running around too much to make everyone else happy and to be honest after all of it I still don’t feel like everyone was happy with the arrangement anyway! I know I wasn’t. So this year Ashley invited us to Thanksgiving and told me to invite my family, so I did. Two birds with one stone on that one, we get to spend it with good friends AND my family. Christmas eve sounds like it is at Ryan’s aunt Diana’s house and we had said last year that we would start doing Christmas morning at our house, and Ryan’s mom Cheryl said that she is doing Christmas day at her place so that’s nice we don’t even have to leave Tierrasanta on Christmas! Im really looking forward to it all. And hopefully we will have the best present of all this year, getting pregnant with our second child!

16 Months old? Seriously?

Aurora will be 16 months old in a few days. The last few months have been such a huge period of growth for her, it stuns me. She is now talking all the time, and has many words under her belt. When our aquarium screen saver goes on the computer, she says "ish!" (the "f" is hard for her to pronounce), and just today walking to the car a black crow flew across the sky and she saw it, pointed and said "bird". She also knows dog, mom, dad, juice, cheese, yes, no, and makes a pretty good effort to repeat any word you say.

She is a huge fan of books now, and will actually let you read one all the way through (as long as too much time is not spent on each page) and will point out things she knows and say them, for ones she doesnt she points them out for you to tell her what they are.

She giggles and cracks up all the time, and her and Daddy especially have a

dozen little games they both play. Like this one, where she puts her hand in your mouth for you to "eat" then pulls it away cracking up cause its the funniest thing in the whole world. It's amazing music to our ears, and we would do anything to get her to laugh time and time again. Our neighbor Erik taught her how to bump it (closed fists against each other) and she thinks thats hilarious now too. Other things that humor her: When Guinness "play" bites her hand, when you try to brush her teeth (just before you actually get inside her mouth, then its not funny anymore), when you chase her pretty much anywhere, when you turn away from her then turn back really quickly and make a face, or say "boo" or other similar thing...

She loves to drink from small cups too. I have been squeezing the juice of an orange in the afternoon and letting her drink it from a small appetizer cup that my mom gave us for her, and she loves it. She's good at it too! Normally no spills although we stand over her careful and ready just in case, and have to remind her to use both hands, since she likes to try it with only one hand.

Did I mention before she's finally in size 12 month? Some stuff is too big, it falls right off of her cause she's so skinny, but she needs that size for her length. (see previous post about her growing 2 inches, and she's grown another 1/2 inch since then!) So it's lots of dresses and tops with the few pants and shorts that fit her normally.

Trying to figure out Halloween, and not sure what Ryan and I are going to do. Rory is going to be a little blue fairy. Got a blue and green tutu, and blue wings. Need to get a blue onsie and we are all set for her!

Still no new teeth since those top molars... but I think a bottom left molar is next, Ryan has a bet against me that its the bottom right. We will see who's right!

Success!

Well the week was a complete success! Aurora was a perfect angel for my family, and they all loved every second with her. They took her on walks, played with the animals, went to the zoo, out on errands... My mom was so funny at one point I talked to her and she said, "this is so much fun, but I haven't gotten a single thing done all week!" The first morning we had her back she called me and said, "I miss her already! I just woke up and she wasn't there..." I love that she loves Aurora so much and it shows in everything she does and says. With that going so well, we have no reservations about leaving her with my mom when we go to Vegas in November [CANT WAIT FOR VEGAS], or for the week of Thanksgiving or the week between Xmas and New Years that our sitter is also off and we have to work that M-Wed. THANKS MOM - You're the best!

Anyway, so we kept ourselves busy, with plans every night. We skyped each afternoon after work, and called to check in many times a day. Our "busy" plan actually backfired though, and Ryan got VERY sick, and is just now finally almost over it. My mom dropped Rory off on Friday (which Ryan had off). Ryan said she was more excited to see Guinness than him. When I got home though, she had already said hi to her best bud and she was excited to see me. I have a feeling if I was in Ryan's shoes though she still would have been happier to see Guinness.

Anyway, we have our little girl back and life is back to normal. Aurora is turning more and more into a little person every day, who clearly expresses her needs and desires, and her talking is progressing. She says a number of words, the clearest basic ones are yes, no, dog, mum, dad, juice, and cheese. She is having way more fun now, laughing and giggling all the time when you play with her. (It used to be that she would smile pretty easily but it was nearly impossible to get her to crack up). Her two upper molars are mostly through, and no others are in sight yet. I was realizing since she got her first teeth at 10 months old and she is now 15 months old, she has gotten almost 2 teeth per month since her first! Poor thing that is so many teeth to cut all at once! Shes liking her books more too, she is starting to point to things in books, and we then tell her what they are. There is one Sesame Street one that talks about body parts and does something similar to the head shoulders knees and toes song and she does the whole thing with the book (clapping, touch your nose, where is your mouth, your tongue hides inside, wiggle your toes, etc.) sooo cute! Ill try to get that on video. But she is so funny when she knows she's on video she wont "perform" cause she gets distracted by it.

Summer Fun!

Aurora is about to have a really fun week! She's staying with my mom next week. It was one of two weeks that our sitter, Diane is on vacation and my mom was sweet enough to agree to take Rory for the week so that we could work and save our vacation time. Her (Mopsey) and Grandpa Wayne are going to have sooo much fun. She's going to come back to us way too spoiled.

Ryan and I on the other hand, are going to miss our baby girl like crazy.... but will be taking full advantage of our time with no post-baby responsibilities. We will be going out to dinner, watching movies, taking long walks... all the things that you cant always fit into your schedule when you have to keep a little one on track and in bed by 7pm. Plus, my mom has skype, so we will be able to at least see/talk to her over the net for a few minutes a day.

Other than that, at 15 months tomorrow, her favorite new game is spinning in circles until she is so dizzy that she falls down. She's also finally started signing. Ashley had said that Boston started signing around 13 months, out of the blue after she had given up on it. Then Nicole was saying how Luke started signing a few weeks ago and I thought, well I should try it again then, and I did, and she is signing! Her favorite is "more" which is like clapping but with closed fists. She pretty much gives is that anytime she wants anything or more of anything. She understands the milk one but isnt good at giving it to us. I think she almost forgets or doesnt realize she is thirsty until we offer it. She is finally starting to *almost* sit still for books now. She will pick one out and bring it to you, and if it has very few words per page or you only read some of it and keep page turning at a quick pace, she will sit for it! I can't wait till she is really interested in stories and longer books, I will sit and read to her for hours. I'll love it.

All Better

Well the reason for her fever was that other molar coming in. So now she has 8 teeth, 2 of them molars! Wholy cow thats a lot of teeth. Her first ones broke at 10 weeks, so thats 2 teeth a month. Wow. She's talking now too! She tries to copy what we say all the time. Its really rough and hard to recognize, only that what 'noises' she makes after we say something sound an awful lot like what we just said. Ryan and my mom & stepdad all took Aurora to the zoo today and apparently she had the best time! So fun. :0)

My Poor Sick Girl

My darling sweetheart has a fever. :0( She had it yesterday afternoon when Ryan picked her up from Diane's. She was so sad, just tired and listless, whimpering softly every so often, and wanting her favorite pacifier. We just watched tv and let her lay on us all evening then put her to bed. Shes drinking fluids ok at least. Should break by tomorrow morning if its like the other 2 fevers she has had, and related to teething. I noticed the other molar (on the right side) is coming in too. Poor thing.

Aurora Updates

Wow has she changed in just a few short weeks.

Well our vacation was wonderful, spending part of the time up in Santa Cruz with my Godparents. We stayed with my godfather Charly and his wonderful husband Tracy. We at wonderful food, took great walks at the beach, took amazing outdoor showers, played with their cute new puppy Wally, and just relaxed. We got to spend time with my godmother Mary Worthy and her family too. They gave us this great kid rocking chair that has been in their family for a few generations, and Aurora loves it. (It was a rocking chair, but the rockers needed repair. Aurora didnt have the patience to fix it, so its currently a chair and if we ever get it out of her hands we might turn it back to a rocker.) The rest of the time off was spend with friends & family. Such a great detox week! It was so nice just to have some vacation time that was spent on... well a vacation! Ive been saving and hording my time for pregnancy leave and such, and didnt realize how stressful it was to worry about every day and hour. I cant say Ill feel the same way about our decision when I see the hit on my vacation hours, but.....

Aurora's top left side tooth finally broke through like a week and a half ago, then the other day surprise, an upper molar on the left side is through too! Shes sticking her fingers in her mouth alll the time and chewing on stuff like crazy.

In addition to her teeth, we noticed recently that she seemed to have grown a lot... so we put her up against the wall where we started marking her height, and sure enough, she has grown 2 inches in 2 months! Poor thing has probably been going through some crazy growing pains in addition to her teething pain. Good thing she's been getting ibuprofen off and on to help her sleep through it.

She's been out in the sun a ton; she LOVES the outdoors and any chance she gets she makes a bee-line for outside. She's developed quite a tan. And anything that has to do with water (bath, pool, garden hose, doggie water bowl) she is THERE.

As mentioned above, she loves her seats. Not just the rocking chair chair, but her Stroller, Carseat, high chair... and she gets VERY angry if you try to take her out of her chair before she is done. She just cries and cries at the end of walks with the strollers, but with her high chair we just dis attach it from the kitchen chair after dinner so she has it on the ground to sit in. So cute. We are for sure going to have to get her her own potty chair when we decide to potty train.

She also loves to walk Guinness on our walks. She looks soooo cute holding the leash with Guinness out walking in front of her. I'll have to get a picture or video of it.

I know Im missing stuff but Ive been trying to get this post up for like 2 weeks, so Im going to just put it up and then have to do another one soon with what I forgot...

Changes Every Day!

Wow, at this stage they are changing every day! Aurora is now 14 months old (as of July 5th). We had a crazy weekend filled with friends and family events. Thursday dinner & games with friends, Friday dinner & games with friends, Saturday faux forth celebration BBQ at Nicole's house (more on that in a bit), Sunday forth up at Uncle Randy's Ranch, and Monday closing day at the fair! Phew, it was crazy.

Saturday was awesome; Nicole and Jason had great food, great drinks and great people over to just enjoy the day and have a good time. The kids were hilarious. Rory had her stunna glasses on, and Luke was eating watermelon like it was going out of style, and both of them ate their weight in baked cheetos. We took them on a big red cart ride, and we all played in the pool (at least until Rory was shivering and her lips were turning blue, then we warmed back up in the hot tub before taking another dip in the pool. The water must have been at least 75 too - man that kid needs to bulk up on some body fat.) Boston showed up later on and tried to keep things under control patrolling in Luke's cop car - it didnt work. Yummy grilled steak marinated in a coffee & chocolate rub and more delicious food, and later, finally fat and exhasted from our big day we gave in to sleep.....

And woke back up the next morning to start the whole process over up at Randy's... in his pool... with the family.... Keira and Rory playing in the sand.... beer pong contests... girl time... guy time.... and finally fireworks at 9am. To which Rory promptly lifted her head with a "huh? whats that?" and decided it wasn't worth the sleep she was missing so she passed out on my shoulder. And there she stayed for another hour, as Ryan proceeded to get wasted on some crazy fire drink that Blake decided to whip up and proclaim "I love you man!" to all the cousins. Him and Melinda had some special bonding time, and Ryan is now the keeper of this year's Halloween Costume secret. Not me, just Ryan. Guess I'll have to wait.

This week was not as tough getting back to work as I thought it would be and now its quitting time and Ryan and I are off next week. Fun plans, but dont have the time to explain now. Maybe next week I'll slip in an update.

First Word!

Well even just the last few weeks Aurora's grown up! She out of nowhere last week started pointing all over the place, now she points at everything. We are still working on blowing kisses (she gets the kiss on the hand but hasn't quite grasped the blowing it away), and trying for bump it. Still hates brushing her teeth (or rather hates us doing it) but LOVES putting on a little chapstick afterward. And still that tooth has NOT come in! Its like taking forever!!!

But the BIGGEST news of the week was Aurora said her first (what I'm calling official) first word, and it was Dada. We got up this morning and she pointed at Ryan and said, clear as day, "Dada". Ryan was beaming and so excited. "Yes, I'm your Dada!" he told her. I love it!

We Skyped with my Mom last night and it was fun. Aurora didnt really know what to think but Im sure she'll get the hang of it after a few more times. And it will be great to Skype with her the week that my Mom is watching her in August for us. We will miss her but boy will it be nice to have a whole "Adult Week" to ourselves! Dinner out, stay up late, watch tv, go to a movie, we are going to be such rebels! lol. I think we will have to make it an annual event with Mopsey (My Mom).

Summer is Here, and Life Goes On...

Life is good! Though busy, that’s for sure. Aurora is still working on that 6th tooth up top. She got a fever last weekend, along with the runny nose and cough that are always present about a week before the tooth comes through. In addition to her being super winey, lethargic and cuddly, and wanting her pacifier 24-7. It all magically went away this weekend, but still no tooth so I’m sure its coming soon.

Last weekend we went up to see Venissa, Joe and their new baby girl Addison. Andrew and Aurora were both more interested in playing with each other than checking out the new baby, but that allowed me time to hold the tiny sweetheart. I forget how small newborns are, and it shows me how much Aurora has grown, even though she is small for her age. I think Addie looks like her mama, but we will see; it’s always hard to tell this young! We also went to go hang out at Harb with my family, and Rory had fun with everyone, especially playing on top of the pool table with all the balls. I got a cute video of her dancing.

She’s really trying to talk now; she babbles in long “sentences” that have the same ebb and flow that conversation does, but it of course doesn’t make any sense. She will try to copy a word if you say it, and repeat it back to her. You wouldn’t be able to tell just hearing what she said, but hearing it with what you say it is clear she is trying to copy the word. Last night she was playing with her cousin Keira (2 ½ years old) and Keira was saying “daddy” and Aurora was saying “daddy” back to her and Keira was getting such a huge kick out of it, like she’s been waiting for this day forever. I love it.

She is getting much better at using a fork and spoon for things, although still needs a little guidance getting the food on it, she can put it in her mouth from there pretty easily. Makes a huge mess, but that’s the nature of the beast! We let her have at whatever food we eat, then when she’s done, we feed her her baby food (she doesn’t get enough of the big people food in her mouth to really fill her up before she gets bored feeding herself).

Watched Food Inc. recently and it made me sooo grossed out by how the food industry has developed to feed us. It makes me even more committed to eating and providing healthy food for my family, and buying as much organic, local, in season and natural food as possible. We will spend $50 on a pair of jeans for ourselves or a video game but not on healthier food for our families? We just have to re-prioritize.

Finally caught up around the house (for the most part) although I need the housecleaner to come again!

Will I Ever Get Caught Up?

Memorial day weekend was amazing. We went to the Kings River with a large group of people. It started out as the Stoops (Ryan’s Aunt and Uncle) and a few of their rafting buddies and their families. Then everyone started inviting other friends and family over the years (us included) and the group has grown from 30-40 people the first 3 years we went to this year it was close to 70. That was a little bit much in my opinion; it felt really disjointed and I didn’t get to spend as much time with everyone I wanted to since we were so spread out. And there were a lot of people we didn’t know. BUT we had our own little baby brigade going, and that was awesome.

We had Aurora, then there was Laura & Marshall’s baby girl Hazel (who is 3 days younger than Aurora), and Marshall’s brother Marco & his wife Destiny with their son Cullen. We spent most of our time trying to keep them clean “enough” and keep them out of trouble, which is easy to find when you are camping. Hazel and Aurora finally got to meet each other which was great, since Laura and I had gotten so close over email the last 2 years as we were pregnant with the girls, delivered them and then this year leading up to the weekend. We threw them a mini bday party even though their 1yr old birthdays had already happened and both of us had thrown parties in our own hometowns for them.

Aurora didn’t eat enough, got too many snacks and junk food, but hey, that’s what special occasions are for right? Thanks daddy for her first Oreo, which she is now OBSESSED with.

Speaking of obsessions, Aurora is obsessed with any kind of water play. Im so glad that summer is near, and it will be hot enough for her to play out on our patio in the wonderful water table that Ashley’s mom got for her birthday. Its nice too cause I can watch her while in the kitchen cooking or cleaning and she can play out there. Still have yet to check out the kiddie pool in our complex but looking forward to it.

On to teeth; the other top middle tooth broke weeks ago, and the other side tooth is ready to break. Which sucks cause when she is teething she is restless and whines a lot at night. She gets a runny nose then a bad cough with it, and needs her pacifier all the time. Cant wait till those crazy molars break through (NOT) which I have heard are beasts. But we are brushing her teeth now, although I have to say its hard to remember to brush her teeth before putting her to bed cause it just has not been part of the routine. Im an old dog and its hard to learn new tricks! Lol. She doesn’t mind too much; just gets really frustrated for the 15 seconds I make her let me brush her teeth then is fine after I hand it over to her. She LOVES the vibration of the electronic toothbrush on her mouth.

Her communication abilities are pretty amazing now. She totally understands what we say, and can follow simple directions, loves helping. Every morning she enjoys taking her diaper and opening the diaper pail and putting her diaper in then closing it. Last night she was helping me pluck grapes off its vine and putting them in Tupperware. When she got bored with that she started feeding them to me one by one. Which actually was a faster process cause I could pluck them way faster than she could feed them to me. This morning she didn’t drink all of her bottle and I always reoffer her her bottle to make sure she isn’t just taking a break . So I asked her “Are you all done with your bottle? Do you want any more?” And she shook her head. But then a few minutes later she was dressed, time to go down stairs and I again offered her the bottle but this time the question was “Can you hold the bottle for Mommy while we walk down the stairs?” and she totally took it and held it. So shes not just interpreting the gestures and inferring the rest; because the gesture was the same, but the only thing different was the words, and she reacted differently.

She’s also walking all over the place now that she came back from camping, where everything was uneven and off road terrain. Back her with flat carpets and unmoving things on it, she can really book it! Its fun to have her run back and forth between two people.

She is using her fork better still needs help stabbing food. We got her her very own spoon and fork from Crate & Barrel. They are so cute! She loves them, even when shes not eating.

Here is the tired part though; she won’t sit still for 2 seconds!!! When she is awake, she is going non stop, and you better be ready to run after her. It’s exhausting and I don’t know how she has the energy to keep it up all day; its not like she eats enough to expend that much. She wont even sit still to watch tv. Other kids are mesmerized by tv shows and movies, but not her. She could care less and they don’t hold her attention for longer than a large bang sound.

So those are the updates on her. Im still trying to get caught up from the weekend at the river. Its tough! Finally downloaded all the photos and videos, but have not yet uploaded them all to my sites (FB, Picasa, etc). The house is a wreck and desperately needs a cleaning and this weekend we will be gone all weekend; Saturday we are celebrating my brother’s birthday at my Mom’s house, and on Sunday we get to see Venissa’s new baby girl Addison, who was born on May 31st. But, as a “seasoned mom” now, I realize that a clean house and getting all your chores done and your to-do-list under 30 items is WAY over rated.

Our Little Peanut

Our little peanut, while growing slowly in size, is none-the-less growing up. It's really amazing that so much has happened and changed in our lives in the last year. I feel like the last year has been the most important and exciting of my life. I know my life is richer and more meaningful than ever before, thats for sure.

Aurora had her 1 yr old apt on Friday. I brought my Mom along for company, and she was going crazy and just about had a panic attack when they wanted to give Rory 6 shots that day. I opted to hold off on one of them for her next apt. My Mom said she would never have given us ANY shots if she could do it over. I just shook my head. Not even going to go there with her! Rory screamed this sad terrified and painful cry the whole time they were shooting her up, as tears streamed down her face and the sobs kept getting stuck in her throat. Poor girl all I wanted to do was cuddle her and tell her it would be ok. She did calm down ok and was fine after that. Besides a very slight fever and wanting to sleep ALOT the next few days she was fine.

She has gained about 2lbs since the 9 month old apt, which is something! Here is how she ranks now:
They said she is doing just fine and they are not worried about her growth at all, since she is tracking on the growth curve as she should.

Shes getting much better at walking now, though its still slow going. She loves walking about 5 steps to you and is so proud when she finally gets to you!

She is wanting to feed herself now, and we let her practice with her own spoon and fork. Shes not great at it yet, but for sure gets the jist of the movements, just not quite fine tuned enough to really get there. Mostly she dips the spoon in things then sucks on it, and with the fork, she picks up a piece of food with one hand, and then stabs it with the fork in the other, then either bites the food off the fork, or takes it back off and eats it with her hand. Its hilarious.

She is playing so much with everything now, its so much fun. And its great that shes more interactive with the other kids now too. We spent almost all day with Ashley, Dylan and Boston on Saturday, and it was a blast. We went to the Tierrastanta Parade, and saw most everyone else we knew in the complex there too, then Ashley and I went to the fair to hang out while the boys took the kids home, we grilled dogs for lunch, hung out in our back yard with the kids playing with the water table Boston's Gma Mimi got her for her b-day, and then that night went to see Rain the Beatles Tribute downtown. It was one of the best days Ive had in a long time. Then yesterday we went to hang with friends we have not seen in a long time and it was awesome.

Her 4th tooth finally broke about a week ago; it was the canine next to the top tooth she already has. But the other top middle and canine are on their way too, so she wont be lopsided for long. Its so nice to have teeth for her, going without them for so long you realize how much teeth really help them eat big people food. Although we have to get her used to brushing now. Good thing she loves the toothbrush, bad thing she only wants to suck on it and not actually brush with it. lol.

She loves all stuffed animals. Skye and Althea got her a super soft pillow that also velcros up into a stuffed ladybug, and she LOVES it. She will give "loves" to just about anything, but is especially happy to oblige for anything soft.

Oh goodness shes just the best! I cant wait for memorial day weekend, its going to be good times with friends and family, and just rest and relaxation. Ahhhhhh long overdue.

Aurora's 1st Birthday

Click on the Picture for the Picasa Folder of all the pictures from Aurora's 1st Bday.

Super Cute Clothes

Oh yeah and I forgot to mention all the adorable clothes she got for her birthday. Added to all the ones she got from her showers and this girl is going to be one well dressed sista! Shes in 6 month stuff now, but I cant wait till she's in her 9 and 12 month old stuff, cause there is too much cute stuff!

Oh yeah, and slight rant here, why the heck is it that the CUTEST stuff starts at 12 month? Like all the cute jeans and shorts mostly. It is so annoying. At this rate, Aurora will be 2 before she is in any of that.

Aurora is One!

Today Aurora is one! Wow, crazy. Hard to believe that a year ago right now I was just getting into the craziest part of labor and in just a few short hours I would be holding my precious baby girl in my arms for the first time ever. Its been an amazing journey, and I am sooo looking forward to the rest of our life!

Aurora is finally walking like a big girl. She is still really shakey (hello Frankenstein), takes little steps staggering from side to side, and falls often. But she is getting better, and Im sure will be running across the room before we know it!

We started milk too. :0) No more formula, she seems to like milk just fine, and will drink the full 4 oz if you heat it up (that much cold milk is too much for her all at once), and she does like to sip cold milk from her sippy cup. We have decided to buy organic milk for her. After reading what the experts are saying, if you are going to buy organic, meat and milk are your best place to spend the money because of all the awful pesticides in the food the cows eat, compounded with the hormones that they are given, etc. You can really tell the difference too; the meat tastes way better, and the milk crisper and creamier. It really breaks the bank, but you cant put a price on the health and well being of your children. And to be honest, I think that in the years to come, they are going to find that things like Autism has more do do with pesticides and hormones in our food than vaccinations do.

Hopefully we can get her to drink the recommended 16-24 oz of milk a day, because she was only taking 8 oz total of formula a day, plus another 6 oz in her morning cereal.

Wow, Big Girl is Almost 1!

Well it's been a while and our life is crazier than ever.

Aurora is still not walking full on; shes really taking her time with this. After her first steps a month ago, she still is only taking up to about 5 steps at a time, in areas she feels comfortable. Which means her shoes are getting all torn up going between walking and crawling all the time. *Sigh*. Thank goodness for Walmart $8 shoes.

We now have 3 teeth total, both bottom and one middle on top. The other 3 up top are bulging and ready to join the others soon. Its so nice she can actually take "bites" of food now with teeth. Its really helped what food she can eat, and that we can share with her now she can take bites of our food. She is good eating off of spoon and fork of ours, but sometimes really would like to do it herself, even though she doesnt have the dexterity to.

She has been a total champ though the teething process though, and besides just being a little fussy and drooly chewing on stuff, shes been good. We have been giving her the Tylenol, orajel and (due to the post nasel drip at night) expectorant for that bad cough. We will see what the doc says at her 1 yr apt on the 14th if she still has that cough. We felt awful on Sat at at work event one of our female pharmacists could feel the congestion in her chest just from holding her.

She is so interactive now though, shes a blast. She loves peek-a-boo, and likes to do the hiding and the peeking herself. She will hold up a sheet, paper towel, etc then back down with a big grin. Another favorite is peeking around corners of furniture or walls.

She has so much fun with her high fives, low fives, head butts, waving, clapping and dancing. She is such a big girl! Still not a ton of talking (just the same babbles) but if you spend anytime with her you do notice she tries to copy what you say every once in a while. You will say something, then are startled when it sounds like she said the exact same thing you just did!

We were lucky to get some of Ryan's old toys and books from when he was a little kid, as Cheryl recently cleaned out her attic, which was mostly full of all Blake and Ryan's childhood stuff. Shes having a blast with all her fun stuff. In the house, we finished putting in the new flooring, and the baseboards, and got some new shelving units for the new "play room". I cant tell you how nice it is to have real floors, and have clear defined spaces and things put away in their place, instead of a constant construction zone with everything out and everywhere. We still have a lot to do but at least we are making headway and each week our house is more organized than it was the previous week. A little at a time is what you gotta do to make it happen!

This weekend was a HUGE weekend. Saturday was Venissa's shower up in Temecula area (shes having a little girl, who will be named Addison!) Thanks to my Mom who joined me for the long drive up (long drives with no one to talk to + Loralyn = asleep at the wheel) and to help me take care of Aurora so I could visit with that group that I hardly ever get to see anymore. Then we had to book it back down to SD after a few hours up there to get set up for a big work event at my Dean's house that he has every year for some of the staff, the faculty, 3rd & 4th year students and alumni. This was my first year planning and attending the event. It turned out great, but it was a long day for all of us, esp Aurora, considering her birthday party was the next day!

So then the big day was yesterday, and it was great! Our best friends and family came out to celebrate with us, everyone pitched in and helped out a ton, and it was just wonderful. I cant wait to see the pictures that Pam took for the event. Aurora looked so cute in her little sunflower dress, and had too much fun with her cake, esp when all her friends joined in. (Kiera was first, then Boston then Luke. We had all the kids up there sharing this pink Sleeping Beauty cake!!!) But my favorite moment of the day was when Luke had his bottle out, and he left it to go play on the other side of the blanket with something else. Aurora reached down, got the bottle and walked it all the way over to where he was and gave it to him! What a sweet little helper. It doesnt surprise me though; our wonderful sitter Diane has 2 infant babies as well as Aurora and apparently Aurora helps with them all the time; gives them their pacifiers, rocks them in their infant seats, etc. Soooo cute! Boy is she going to come in handy with the next kid.

Anyway, by the end of the day, packing everything up for a huge picnic to the park then packing back up and to our house, plus all the gifts (that we still have yet to open!), our house is a mess, and we are exhausted but so happy and blessed. Now on to Mother's Day events, and after that Memorial Day weekend at the King's River. Cant wait for that, its going to be so much fun!!!

We Have Teeth!!!

What a week! Tuesday Rory cut her first tooth. So after that fever she got last week and her first steps, what a surprise! I’m wondering now if the fever was a pre-curser to the tooth. Cheryl said that Ryan got a high fever each time before his teeth. So we will watch for that fever again and it might indicate another tooth is on the way. Anyway, so Tuesday morning Aurora woke up fussier than I have ever seen her – for no apparent reason. Normally she is so happy to wake up and we do stretches and change her diaper, get into her clothes, and off to Diane’s. But this particular morning she was crying and fussy and was very unhappy. She was still winy if you held her and watch out if you set her down for a second.

Well Diane said she was a little grumpy that day too, and we picked her up, and Ryan fed her dinner. Melinda was over because Nathan was out of town this week for work, and just as Ryan finished feeding Aurora dinner and was cleaning her up in her high chair, he started jumping all around the kitchen yelling “I found a tooth, I found a tooth!” I was like, what? Are you serious? Get out! But no, there it was, the middle-right tooth on the bottom poking through! She was much happier after it cut through her gums and has been a happy camper since then. Although, she does bite too hard once in a while on something and I think hurts her gums up top or her cheeks on the side.

Ryan put in the pull up bar in the living room last night so I’m excited to soon start my new program.

Family Updates...

Aurora is almost 11 months old! And 4 days before turning 11 months old (yesterday to be exact), she took her first steps! YOU GO GIRL! It was so cute. She was so tentative about it, like she was thinking “Im going to try something, but Im not quite sure how this is going to end up…” my friend Alyssa was there to witness it, and so was Ryan. We even got a few of the after steps on video. Now this is no where near walking, that will probably come in the upcoming weeks, but its so exciting none the less. So she stood on her own for the first time at exactly 10 months, and now walking at 11. :0)

Other than that, she can wear all 6 month old clothing now. All of her smaller sized shirts and dresses though still fit her small frame. (It’s mostly her jammies that she grows out of quickly since she is of average height she gets too tall for things with feet on them). Some of my favorite shirts to go with jeans were actually little dress/shirts that went with little bloomers and are newborn size! But they look so darn cute as shirts with her little jeans. I’m so excited to dress her for the upcoming events of Easter, her birthday then Mother’s Day. I’m actually stoked that she is standing and will be walking for them, since it makes the dresses all the cuter when she is standing like a little lady in them.

She loves eating the same food as us, and as long as we have food on our plates and are eating, she will take bites from us. STILL NO TEETH! I’m so annoyed because she soo wants to be eating more grown up food but doesn’t have any teeth to assist her. And there are none in sight either. I am beginning to wonder if she even has any teeth under those gums! Lol. She did get a fever this week though. Monday I went to pick her up from Diane’s and she had a fever of 102. I stayed home with her in the morning since Ryan had an inspection and then he came back after noon and took over. She was such a sweetie; didn’t whine or cry at all, just slept a lot and wanted to cuddle. It finally broke on Wed and she went back to Diane’s on Thursday. But she now has a cough and a really congested nose. Poor dear. Hope she is fully better for Sunday. So she has had a total of 3 colds and this one fever by her 11th month birthday.

Her desire to communicate is growing too. There have been many times that I swear she says something. I’m sure it is just a coincidence but one thing is for sure; she is babbling like crazy and she thinks she is saying something important. Her sounds are so cute too. She does a “deedle deedle” where she sticks her tongue in and out, and of course her “bobble bobble” where she does a sound like an Indian but with the back of her hand, she claps, she does high five, and she does a “dance dance dance” where she shimmies her shoulders up and down alternating them, and its so freaking cute. We have a few instances of it on video and I really want Ryan to put them into a video montage of it. I might get desperate enough to learn the editing software for myself.

Today my step-dad, mom and Ryan are all home putting in our new wood flooring in the living room, hall and den. Im soooo excited to finally have this project done! I didn’t mind the concrete for a long time but at a certain point, you just want real flooring! More for Aurora than anything else. I cant wait to get it in and pick out some nice area rugs. I love you honey, you are the best! And special thanks to Wayne and my mom, who we couldn’t have done any of it without your help!

And I ordered the P90X program… I’m committed to get ripped in 90 days. And it coincides with the biggest loser challenge that me and some other co-workers are doing. Im going to do a separate blog about it and do nasty muffin top photos in my pair of skinny jeans (as in jeans that I used to be able to fit in when I was skinny, NOT the new style of jeans with tapered legs that make everyone look like a cow), the whole bit. If I fail, I will do it in front of all my friends and family. Good motivation, I think.

OH and my bestest friend from college, Venissa is having a girl! Her shower is the day before Aurora’s bday party and Im so stoked. Little girl stuff is too much fun! She’s scheduled for a C-section at the end of May so our little girls will both be May babies together. AWWWWWW.

Ok that’s it for now! Sorry I’m so MIA on here, life happens…

Wow, New Stuff Already?

Aurora is now waving... at everything. Including the plants, windows, pretty much everything. And when she really gets into it, she does it with both arms. Like special things need a special super duper double wave.

She stood unassisted all by her self for a few seconds (multiple times) last night. Funny part is, she seems a little unsure about it, like "Im not so sure I should be doing this, what is going on here???" Funny because she doesnt seem to have those same thoughts about chewing on the freezer electrical cord, or eating Guinness's dog food.

Maybe its just my mother's ear, but it really seems like when I talk to her, and try to work on words with her, she *tries* to repeat them back to me. Could just be my imagination though. Last night I was dreaming about doing work... and was sad when I got to work and realized it wasnt actually done.

I think Im going to have to get Skype for my Mom. Yes, the same Mom who only lives 30 min away. Why might you ask? Because every day I currently have to listen to, "do you think she is even going to remember who I am???" since we only see my Mom once a week. And if we can't see her one week.... well from her reaction you would think that she lived across the US and had missed every important milestone that Aurora has reached from birth to 2 years old. It's all in good fun though - I love you Mom - it shows how much you care.

Family Changes...

Well getting my period today coincides nicely with going back on birth control, which I got in the mail this week. Since I am done breastfeeding and we wont be trying to get pregnant again until the summer/fall, I wanted to go back on birth control – my periods are WAY heavier now post baby and off of bc then they used to be. So Im hoping they will be a little more manageable now when I start bc again. (Although I cant complain, my “heavy” is still most women’s light days. Some of you may want to shoot me for calling 4 tampons a day heavy.)
Speaking of heavy, a not so fun side effect of not breastfeeding anymore; gaining weight! I was doing really well and was back down to 142 at the tail end of breastfeeding, then when I stopped I crept back up to a high of 147 again. I’ve been watching it the last week or so and am down to 144 but clearly I need to be more careful. Besides, I want to get down again for the summer, and stay there before I get pregnant again. Its not really ok with me to be heavier starting this pregnancy than I was the last one; it would be way to easy to just keep gaining a few pounds here and there between these things and never really loose it before the next event, and before you know it, Im 175 lbs! I do exercise when I can (Ryan and I take walks and I try to go jogging once a week), but it’s so hard when all you want to do is spend time with your little one!

So the reason that we decided to try again this summer/fall is a long story. It shouldn’t be, but it is. Well, originally we wanted to have as many kids as we could afford. Hopefully 3. Stretch goal of 4. Minimum of 2. And we had thought that 3 years apart was just about right; not too much time between them that they couldn’t relate to each other, and that my eggs dried up, but any less time between them they might compete and might not be enough recoup time for us between kids. Well then we realized we would be spitting kids out for the better part of a decade. That’s a little overwhelming. Then we realized that the limiting factor for getting on to the next stage in our lives (after the whole child having stage) to be able to actually do stuff with them was when we had the final kid, and that kid finally was in school. (Finances freed up from childcare, expected career development and raises on our part, etc.) sooooooooo we finally came to the conclusion that it would be better to space them out more like 2 years apart. All the advantages of having them closer together but still far enough apart that it wouldn’t be overwhelming.

Then came the discussion of how many to have. We have known for some time time that if we had more than 2 kids it would be a serious financial strain, and the biggest factor was housing. Our current place really only comfortably can fit a family with two kids, and preferably of the same sex so they can share the 2nd bedroom comfortably. (The 3rd bedroom downstairs really isn’t a viable bedroom). And we knew that we couldn’t afford a bigger house anytime in the next decade. We realized that we would rather be able to do all (or most) of the amazing things we wanted with our kids (travel, etc.) if we just stopped at two, and were able to stay in our current house. Since we have come to terms with this, we both feel better and more comfortable with the future of our family. YEA!
Sooooo, back to the storyline, we will be trying again this fall, to get them spaced out about 2 years.

Aurora is having tons of fun playing with more things, “talking” up a storm and has turned into a one woman band with all the fun noises she makes. She loves to run the back of her hand over her mouth and make the “bibble bobble” sound as we call it, run her “motorboat” mouth, and cluck like a chicken. Recently she started sharing her pacifier with me too; if I ask her to share it and open my mouth, she’ll take it out of hers and put it in mine… for like a second before popping it back out and back to her – patience isn’t a strong suit for kids that young. She has traded in her favorite word of “daddy” for all these sounds, but we are working on some basic baby sign language and some words too. (Like “again” to repeat a fun game or movement that she likes). She hasn’t quite mastered the wave for hello and goodbye but we are working on that too! We also need to work on “kisses” since she thinks that means open your mouth as wide as you can and see what flavors you can suck off of the other person’s mouth. It would be gross coming from anyone but Aurora. lol

She has one cupboard that she is allowed in, with all the plastic and metal kitchen stuff, and she loves taking everything out and playing with it while I’m cooking and cleaning. Still no walking yet; she’s great at crawling and cruising and seems to be very content at this stage. (Compared to her friend Luke who just came up, literally, out of nowhere and is now walking!)

At nearly 10 months, still no teeth! I’m beginning to doubt she even has any of them underneath those deliciously pink gums. But I still practice brushing my teeth with her. She gets to suck on and hold her toothbrush while I do mine, and I let her have a little taste of the minty freshness, which she loves.

She is finally fitting well in all of her 6 month old clothing. (Although many clothes that don’t have a height limitation - like her jammies - still fit; she still has shirts that are newborn size that fit her perfect with jeans now.) We just bought her easter dress, so cute; white with little sunflowers all over it!

The Beginning of the End

1/19/10: I didn’t have enough milk for Aurora’s early morning feeding, and had to go get her 2oz of formula to top her off. So I skipped the pumping that night, in hopes that I would build up enough milk for the next morning.
1/20/10: I had enough milk for Aurora, but was sad that it took over 14 hours to build it up. Did NOT take my pump to work, since I knew at this level of production I wouldn’t need to pump. Decided to try to breast feed Aurora for her bedtime feeding, which is normally a bottle. (She is best about breastfeeding when A. I have enough milk, B. When its time to sleep; night and early morning, and C. When I do it in her room, with the lights out in the rocking chair.) Wasn’t as through of a feeding as I would have liked, but at least she did it. Didn’t pump afterward.
1/21/10: Seemed to have enough this morning too. So my new schedule is no pumping, breastfeed for the early morning feeding, formula (and all her yummy food) during the day, and a breastfeeding at night to send her to sleepyland. We will see how long she is good about feeding for those two times, and how well my production holds up for that.

On a related note, she LOVES food! My favorite so far is fish with carrot and cheese sauce. It is so good I would eat it, and she really enjoys it. It has been great to get all these awesome ideas and recipes from Top 100 Baby Purees (Thanks Lisa!!!) because I would never think of all of them on my own. She is also a huge sweet potato fan, and of course her old classic stand by, cereal with fruit. She is really good with her finger foods, (Cheerios, crusty bread, etc.) She has a strange upset tummy with random things though. She ate a cracker over the holidays and threw it up later, then this last weekend we were out to dinner and they had fresh made flour tortillas (not whole grain but I thought it would be fine, just flour and water, right?) WRONG, she threw up exorcist style. I had a fun time trying to clean her and her chair up in the women’s restroom of the restaurant at the same time. She is now eating a full 3 times a day, or 4-5 if they are small meals. A full meal is normally 3 cubes of food, 2 heaping tablespoons of cereal mixed with 2 oz of formula and about 3oz of milk or formula to wash it down. Wow! I have a good video of eating but it needs some “super soldier” editing first. ;0)

She is also loving cruising around, and wants to walk. She isn’t trying to walk on her own yet; realizes that to get from point A to B she will still go back to the floor to crawl, but she has a blast pulling herself up on everything she can to make herself a big tall girl. After seeing how much she loved a rolling walker that Boston let her try out at the park a week back, we bought one of our own. It’s so cute; a Disney princess “car” that also has a nice handle on the back, so she can use it as a walker or sit on it and have us push her which she loves too. I don’t think she is going to make my prediction of walking by 9 months (which is in 2 weeks) but I do think she will be right on track for what I was; sometime in the 10th month.

She tries to get into everything now, plays with everything, but knows the word “no” and does listen to us when we say it seriously with force. Sometimes she gets sensitive and starts to cry, but usually she just takes it with a grain of salt and finds something else to do. We are so lucky!

She also got her first taste of cake. Boy oh boy does she love it. We got to go to an AWESOME 1st B-day party of Mr. Boston Bruce, and Ashley put the cake down on the ground outside for easy access to all the kids (what a great idea!). We held Aurora back for a little bit but she REALLY wanted to be a part of the action, so we let her go for it. This is what transpired:

Boston digs in...

The other kids just can't hold back

Aurora's first taste of cake...

Look at the cake, mom!

Look at this mess, seriously!

Evidence of the crime scene.... the tracks that the criminal left.

Into EVERYTHING

Well, our days of cute cuddly little Aurora are done. Welcome to the days of "No!" and "Not for you!", bumps, bruises, and frustrated babies. If we were not sure before, Aurora is officially my baby. She wants to be a part of everything, has the patience of... well an 8 month old (and if she takes after me that number will not grow with her age), and is so easily frustrated at everything that she CANT do that her squeals of dissatisfaction have prompted calls from the neighbors to CPS – well no, not quite, but that is a growing fear of mine.

She is not a happy camper when:
- She can’t walk
- She can’t be at your level
- She can’t chew Guinness’s chew toys
- You won’t give her your pretties (jewelry)
- We don’t have her food ready the second she decides she is hungry
- We don’t feed her fast enough
- I don’t have as much milk in my jugs as she wants (yea formula)
- Her legs get stuck up in her sleepers since her legs are so skinny they don’t stay down in the legs
- She has to stay still to get dressed

She is happy when:
- She is sleeping
- She is nursing (well) or drinking her bottle or eating
- She is playing with her favorite toy while sucking her favorite passy
- You are playing peek-a-boo with her
- You are tickling her

She is moving all over the place and won’t sit still for one single second. She is either up and moving, or down and sleeping. Nothing in between. No happy content baby to just sit and play quietly. She tries to commit suicide every other minute in a myriad of ways; chewing on electrical cords, diving off chairs and couches, jumping out of your arms, trying to walk even though she clearly doesn’t have the balance or dexterity for it yet… Every time she does one of these things, Ryan gives me the look. The look says, “that is your daughter, and she is acting just like you.” I’m waiting for the busted lips and black eyes. At least the damage is limited, for the time being, seeing as how she is so short; hence close to the ground. *Sigh* We are in for it.

Nearly 8 Months!!!

Christmas wrap-up; Wednesday was my last day of work for the week, and we got home and went over to the Rubin’s for a cocktail party for our cousins Meg and Justin, who had just come in town for the holidays. It was great to see them again, and to get the holiday festivities started. I was a little worried about how Aurora would do with the first of 3 evenings out, when she usually goes to bed so early (between 6-8pm) but she did fine.

Christmas Eve day I spent at home, trying to get ready for the upcoming days. Ryan had to go in to work, but came home early to catch a nap, since both of us had come down with a bad cold, just in time for the holidays! Luckily Aurora didn’t get sick at all, probably because of the antibodies in my breastmilk for the same sickness we were fighting – Go breastfeeding!!! My Mom came over to help clean up, make my potluck dishes and hang out, then later that afternoon we headed up to Ramona to spend Christmas Eve with Cheryl’s side of the family. Aurora did great, and had no problem with her first Santa encounter.

The next day was crazy; Christmas morning till 10:30 at Cheryl’s house, then over to my Mom’s house till 3pm and over to the Rubin’s for the rest of the day.

Then over to the Stoops on Saturday for after Christmas brunch and to meet Kimmy’s new beau, (who is a TOTAL doll).

We were planning on driving up to Huntington Beach on Sunday to visit my Aunt Tina and her family but she got pretty sick so we decided to put it off till sometime next month. Good thing too, because we were exhausted and the house was an absolute disaster! My Mom came over to help with Aurora and clean up and finally the house is back in order.

I’m pretty sure that Aurora is teething. She has been randomly fussy for no reason, (SCREAMING her head off, like she has never done before) then a while later is fine. She didn’t want to go to bed last night, even though she was clearly exhausted for hours. Finally I just took her into our room and let her hang out on the bed with me and Ryan while he read a book and she and I just laid there until we both got sleepy and I put her to bed. She woke up at midnight and again at 5am crying and wanting to nurse. We will see how today goes. Quick Happy Birthday to Keira, who is 2 today.

She eats a ton and LOVES her food. I am making more interesting foods and she is a fan. Her fav is sweet potatoes and onion with cumin. I have to admit it tastes pretty good! I made a creamy pea batch with mango and garlic and she likes that too. Old standby is cooked apples with banana and cinnamon. Can’t wait till she gets her teeth and she can eat more finger foods, because she is wanting to, just cant yet. (I can wait for the fussiness that goes with teething though). It’s crazy because her friend Hazel already has 4 teeth.

Other than that she is an active baby, getting into everything and pulling herself up on anything she can grasp. She is very much like Ryan though; when you get mad and tell her “no” she gets very upset and starts crying. I feel awful so I don’t do that often. Luckily she is really good and doesn’t get into bad stuff very much – yet.

Some stuff she is already mastering for her age: pulling herself up to stand and cruising, picking things up with her thumb and finger, banging things together, coordinated crawling, wanting to drink from a sippy cup… but hasn’t gotten other things yet like waving goodbye or pointing to things. Saying “mama” and “dada” much more, which makes us happy, but still doesn’t realize what she is saying.

Now on to breastfeeding. I will first say that before having Aurora, I considered breastfeeding to be a simple choice, (to borrow a phrase from a friend), like disposable vs. cloth diapers. After being a working mom now for 5 months, and pumping up to 8 times a day, taking fenugreek and trying to breastfeed whenever possible to keep up production, I can attest that its not that simple. I do still believe that anyone who wants to breastfeed (or provide breastmilk) can. The question is how dedicated you are, and how much time and effort you have in you to put into making it happen. At some point, the cost is not worth the benefits of providing that to your child. And that cost/benefit ratio is different for every mom, and every mom has their breaking point.

I was lucky that Aurora breastfed really well from the beginning, and that I didn’t have any issues in those first 3 months where breastfeeding was getting established. When I went back to work it got a little more complicated. Aurora got used to the bottle and didn’t want to bf if I didn’t have plenty of milk. When I went back to work, the only time that I could bf her was in the morning and at night. The night time one was a problem, since that was the feeding we had chosen to get her used to the bottle before I went back to work, since Ryan could do it and bond with her too. So when I did go back, suddenly I wanted to breastfeed her at night again, and for most of her life she was used to Daddy doing a bottle feeding instead. So basically I was left only being able to do one breastfeeding a day (in the morning) and having to pump throughout the day and evening for the rest of it. THANK God I have an amazing and supportive boss who gave me a place to pump and the flexibility in my schedule to do it when I need to.

Anyway, anyone who has done the research will tell you that pumping does not stimulate your milk production the same way that a baby does, and without the baby to jump start your production on the turn of a dime, you have to rely on pumping every 2 hours and fenugreek to bring it back up. It is hard work. And sometimes you just cant pump every 2 hours! Its all of the work and then some of the bottles and storage, and none of the convenience of breastfeeding. And eventually, if you don’t have any baby stimulation, your body will probably decrease production and it will dwindle away. And forget unexpected things that decrease your production; stress, getting sick, not being able to pump consistently for a day or two due to whatever, etc.

Well I made it this far (almost 8 months). I was hoping to make it to a full year, but that is not going to happen. We have needed to supplement with formula here and there when my production goes down anyway and there is now more of that. I’m still hoping to produce until a year, but we will see. Recently my production dropped, and I tried to get it back up with no avail. And with all the holiday stuff going on it was impossible to pump every 2 hours, so I just decided I was done with it! THEN Aurora was really good about feeding and brought some of my production back up. So Im providing about 10-14 oz a day of breastmilk for her, and she drinks about 18-24 oz a day, so she is still getting over half of her intake as breastmilk. My decision for here on out is to NOT stress about it. I will try to breastfeed when I can, pump when I can, produce as much as my body does, but I will not obsess about taking the fenugreek and pumping every 2 hours, monitoring my daily production like a dairy farmer. Since I decided this, I have been so much happier! A weight has been lifted from my shoulders! And I have to say that I have the most wonderful and supportive husband, who is behind me 100%.

I have learned A LOT on this first go, and hopefully things will be easier and I will be more successful with our next child. But if I am not, that will be ok too, because Aurora has taught me to be easier on myself. I’m a good and loving mom, and my children will be raised well, with the best that Ryan and I have to offer.

7 Months Old... and Counting!!!

I don’t know how Aurora manages to develop so quickly but I feel like every time I turn around she is doing something new. Less than 2 months ago she couldn’t get around much by herself… then we propped her up and she was able to sit up on her own. Then she began to catch herself when she would start to fall instead of falling face first into the ground. From that position she learned to fall forward into a crawling position, and began to (with great effort) crawl forward a few feet. After getting the crawling down in a more coordinated movement, she surprised us by pushing back into a sitting position. And now, just this week, can pull herself up along something sturdy to standing position! I think we are in trouble and she’s going to be walking within the next 2 months for sure, maybe less. At least she will still be too short to reach most things.

We are finally growing out of some of the 3-6 month old stuff, and going into the straight 6 month stuff (which is just a little too big for her) and trying to find as much cold weather clothes for her since she is her daddy’s girl; cold all the time and needs to bundle up like she’s camping in Patagonia! Fleece sleepers, socks or tights, pants and long sleeve onsies are our best friends these days. She is for sure taller than she is wide so the length of her clothes is what she grows out of first.

She generally seems to be a bigger fan of the airy/breathy sounds your mouth can make than the sounds that your lips make. She is finally “talking” a little more though, thank goodness. This whole time she has mostly just made cooing noises, no “mama”, “baba” or “gaga” sounds for her. So she is finally exploring with some of those other sounds.

Very excited about her first Christmas. We got our tree up 2 weekends ago, and it’s sooo pretty! I love all the decorations and already have some gifts wrapped under the tree. We have already learned the “no” word; thankfully she is impressionable and heeds our requests instead of ignoring them. Although she can’t touch, she LOVES the lights, ornaments, and the wrapped presents. She loves paper and so I give her a piece of the wrapping paper to play with. I think she likes the crinkle noises it makes.

We got our Xmas letter out this week, YEA, right on time. We decided to do a huge 4 page letter since this was such a momentous year, and used lots of pics instead of just doing one photo card and a 1 page letter. So any of you who don’t get one by Monday and want to get added to our distribution list, send me your address!

Oh yea and one more thing! She is finally truly sleeping all the way through the night. From 7pm to 6am the next morning, Ryan and I have uninterrupted “us” time. We normally go on a double duty cleaning frenzy, catch up with our shows/movies, or do a project together (like Xmas cards) in those precious hours after she goes to bed and before we do.

6th Month Appointment

Well Aurora had her 6 month appointment. It went well, and she is a happy healthy girl, if not super tiny! She is still in the <3 percentile (hovering just off of the bottom of the charts) for weight, and is 10-25th percentile for head circumference and height. They are not very concerned, since she is maintaining the same arc and is gaining at a consist ant rate. Ryan said they said, "Slow but steady" and that reminded him of me.... turtle, turtle! They gave her her vaccinations, and the regular flu shot, but only were giving the H1N1 to high risk - high risk groups. (So being a baby wasnt enough, you had to be a baby with heart disease or leukemia, etc.) So we will just have to forgo and hope that it doesnt come around to our part of town!

She is getting so good at sitting up on her own now. She can sit up on her own for minutes at a time, back straight - until something causes her to loose her balance then she still falls over, not being able to catch herself yet. She can even sit up without the aid of her hands for stability for short periods of time.

She loves to eat but we still struggle to make sure she drinks enough milk to stay hydrated! At least I'm producing enough at this point. We have not had to give her formula for a few weeks now.

On another note, I am almost back down to pre-baby weight! A bad weekend really sets me back, but somehow I am managing to get back ahead of it during the work week by eating healthy and running twice a week. Just in time too, because I have had some events at work that required a nice suit, which I have not fit for about a year now!

Well, thats all I can think of for now...

6 months already? What's next... sweet 16???

Where does time go? I just realized its been over a month since my last blog entry, and after reading it, WOW has so much changed!!!

Well I’m still pumping away. I had a little stressful period a few weeks ago and my production decreased by 50% - that was really bad. But I got it back up. We have had to supplement with a bottle of formula here and there, mostly depending on how much she is drinking, since my production is pretty much consistent. She is only waking up once now, between 3:30 and 5, for a feeding and sometimes takes both sides, sometimes only one, and tops off at 6 before I pump. Same work pumping schedule (9, 12, 3) and then when I get home pumping at 6 and 9. I have been breast feeding on the weekend, and she is fine with it, so that’s GREAT.

She has been eating the basic 4 for a while now; Apples, Pears, Bananas, Rice Cereal. We have tried Avocado 4 times now, which she HATES. She scrunches up her nose and squishes it around without swallowing like she is eating something really gross. Well they say it takes up to 10 times to like a new food right? She loves Sweet Potatoes too (thanks to Nicole for sharing her batch with me). She is eating so much too! Diane (our sitter) is feeding her 5 tablespoons of rice cereal and 2 cubes of food for breakfast every day. No wonder she isn’t as hungry for us in the evenings. Still drinking 20-28oz of milk a day. My guess is she is close to 12 lbs, so we will see at her 6 month appointment, on 11/6.

It is amazing how active she is now. We did end up getting the rainforest jumperoo, and she thinks it’s the greatest thing since sliced bread. She loves playing, but mostly sucking on her soft toys, especially her stuffed frog with the bee in the middle. She rolls over comfortably both ways now, and is even starting the army crawl. She gets frustrated when she can’t quite move to where she wants, and voices her frustration at her current situation by arching her back and whining. She can sit up too! (Not on her own, but can stay if propped up)


And miss giggles:


A few miscellaneous things… we moved up to the 6 month old pacifiers some time back, move to size 2 diapers, got a sippy cup for water which she is having fun practicing with (AKA beating her head with), moving into 6 month old sleepers (since her legs are so long she doesn’t fit in her 0-3 too well anymore). She loves watching me brush my teeth so I give her her own to hold while I brush, and I put a little fleck of the toothpaste on her lips so she can associate the taste with brushing. No teeth yet though! Definitely not “talking” yet, just lots of elongated “ahhhhhh”s and “ehhhhhhh”s.

We changed our Halloween costumes after Party City not having the baby bunny one in her size in stock. She is now going to be a flower (green sleeper with a flower hoodie), I’m mother nature, and Ryan is a gardener. Although we did find a tiny set of fairy wings in a store the other day that just about made me cry they were so cute. They were like $30 though so there was no way… I am REALLY looking forward to our Halloween Party on Sat; it’s the one big party of the year that we go all out for and everyone has a great time. And this year with all the little babes dressed up, its going to be the best! We will have to get a group pic of the kids: Rory, Luke, Boston, Keira… am I missing anyone???

Happy day though, I am almost back down to pre-prego weight! Wahoooooo! It’s so nice to be able to fit in most of my old cloths again. Although my body has for sure changed shape and there are some things I don’t think I will be able to wear again, I like my new “woman” body and feel really good about it. I’ve been running twice a week and that really helps; it’s great for the mind, spirit and body. I feel guilty about it sometimes, but I really need that time for myself. I get Tu Th for it and then Ryan gets to ride his bike to work on M Wed.

Well that just about catches us up… I sure hope I can get on here more often!

Growing Before Our Eyes

How time flies!!! My co-worker brought in her 2 week old yesterday and it was crazy to see a newborn; made me realize how TINY Rory was just a short while ago, and how much she has grown since then. (Since all I was concentrating on was how little she is in comparison to all the other kids her age.)

I have given up trying to breastfeed during the day/afternoon because I was prolonging pumpings hoping to bf and then when she wouldn’t I would miss out on whole pumping sessions, and my production went down. So I’m back on schedule; she wakes up for her early morning feedings and I can get in anywhere from 2-3 of those before leaving for work. I pump for the first time right before leaving after her last morning feeding, (around 6am) and pump every 3 hours for the rest of the day for a total of 6 pumpings. Before that last 9pm pumping at bed, I can sometimes get her to bf for it. I’ve also started taking fenugreek to help with supply. All in all I can get anywhere from 12-16 oz pumped each day (plus whatever she is getting when she bfs). Which should be enough, especially considering we have started her on food too (rice cereal first then bananas, which she LOVES).

But she must be going through a crazy growth spurt because she recently began waking up as early as midnight for a feeding again, then every 2 hours after that till morning. And she is not satisfied with just a bottle (no matter the size) at night; she needs rice cereal to be content. With her added hunger, I have not been able to produce enough; last week we used 2 batches of frozen milk, and last night we supplemented with a large bottle of formula. She seemed to be fine with it; I tasted it and thought it tasted stale and gross; breast milk tastes WAY better! I don’t mind a bottle of formula every now and then as long as she is getting mostly breast milk. Boy is this tough! We will see how long my production holds out. I’m hoping to be producing for her for up to 2 years old, but we will see.

She is so active its crazy; she chews on her feet all the time, and is not pacified to just sit anymore; she wants to be playing, and entertained. We are looking around to get a rainforest jumparoo; from what I have read and heard kids LOVE them and apparently walkers actually hinder development for walking.

I came up with awesome Halloween costumes too (thanks Lindsey and Melissa); Ryans going to be Hef (he already has that so he doesn’t need to buy anything), Ill be a playboy bunny and Rory will be a baby bunny! (And meaningful, since Ryan calls me his honey bunny and Rory his baby bunny). Im excited to get pictures taken of her. :0)

I know there is more to update on, but I don’t get around to posting often enough and by the time I do post I have forgotten what I wanted to post about! Ahhh, mommy brain.

Clone Wars

Above: Rory at about 3 months, and then me, at 4 months.

Ryan told me the other day, "You just went and cloned yourself... what the hell did you need me for?"